Yes, I'm a kidult, someone who collect toys like a hobby, something most people of my age don't do enthusiastically. You may want to see my latest post on KAge.
But anyone care to know why?
Say, 20 years back, sometime before the final examination, I got all my toys thrown away. Toys like Marcross (the space vessel itself), some Saint Seiya figures, some other toys that can fetch big bucks today, all gone over night.
Reason? Till now I still don't know why, and my parents also gotten confused as to why.
Like some sort of making-up for it, I started to buy toys secretly at young age after that, and hide it cracks and corner at home that are hidden from public eyes. As I got older, and the hidden collection get bigger, I also have bigger financial control of my own. As a result, the habit continues, until today.
While this have finally become some sort of mutual understanding these days, whereby I can get whatever I want as I don't bankrupt myself, I still do it in total secretive. In a way, it's some sort of addiction.
Am I making an excuse? I don't know.
But one things have certainly changed after yesterday, after getting the Saint Seiya I did not got to play with, and a much improved version some what 20 years from that fateful night.
Are things going to change drastically from now on? I won't know. But one thing I can be sure, I have to focus on bigger dreams. No more petty childhood dream, only bigger vision that path my years to come.
I must say, my boss during my Beijing days were really very understanding ones, they have taught me some of the most important management lessons in life. However, not everyone every where has such privilege, and the fortune is turned for me now.
Handling you boss can be tough, even tougher when it's a job you yearn to work for more than 6 months.
My current job requires me to report not one, but 2 bosses, of one will be directly above me, while another be the one whole decide how far I'll go. Having one is interesting, but two just make it too interesting.
What can I do? Learn.
How my seniors in the co survived the pass 2 years? How the manager of another department got to move up so fast? What make my bosses' colleuage up there today? All these are things I will see everyday, and things I need to pick up and get myself more secured to my desk, which is actually where a lot interns are assigned to.
If working like is a matter of great risk, now is the time of wait, and see.
A lot time I have not been sprinkling anything here, like my life have really become a puddle of stagnant water.
But I guess not.
Like a mirror, my life is mirroring that of many others recently: I'm busy with work, squeezing time out only for a bit of gaming and rest; I've started to learn driving, realising I should make use of the resource at home; a new receptionist has popped into my company, and this smart gal is stirring some interest in me.
In all, very typical things, and takes a lot of time.
Where's my plan to go the nearby beach park? Where's the time I should be spending to learn Japanese proper? Where's the time I should be using to give some help to lou ma zi and lou dou in this time? Where's the time I should be reaching out to my inner self and sprinkle them here?
Yes, I do have time for that also, actually.
Time has never and will not ever be on your side unless you are aware of the many ways you can better manage it. Learn it, or lose it, and the moment, NOW.
Life should never really be routine like, and it's time I really should take charge of it again and put the direction I want to go all these while.